Shiiiit, ever since I’ve left the school I’ve been attending for the past 2 1/2 semesters, I’ve been feeling like my minds getting back on track. I’ve been lost, I feel like I’ve been in a toxic environment. When the majority of people are stressin’, you can’t help but to get infected. I usually try and not get myself down, but it seems to be how I’ve always felt recently. I couldn’t explain why; was it just the room I was living in? Was it the expectations people had that I feel like I wasn’t living up to?
At this point it’s whatever.
I’ve been so caught up in my own [paranoid; draining] thoughts that smoking weed doesn’t seem to be helping anymore, only hurting, since it’s such a meditative state when you’re high. I’ve done enough meditating, I need to start doing. When the thoughts settle, perhaps I’ll indulge again, but this is no time for indulgence.
My advice to myself (and to whoever bothers to read this): Appreciate being, appreciate where life takes you, even if life drags you through the shit (whether it be your own or other people’s) because what we live is a random occurrence.