September 2010
9 posts
True, but considering I believe God is within me, I don’t have to prove that I’m strong since I already know that I am strong. I use fasting as a way to take away the luxury of eating, as a way to focus. In a way it helps meditation, nahmean
Recently, I have felt I have seen better days, and because of this my mind has been overrun with negative thoughts that aren’t the real me. I’m a dude that ain’t afraid to hide his emotions, so when shit has got me down, ya’ll would know. It’s a good thing in general, cause when i’m myself, it means everyone is going to have mad fun, have a good time. So when I feel like the way that I have been feeling, I don’t want to have other people know, because that ain’t me. Therefore, I tend to have a lot of time to myself and my thoughts, but when my thoughts are all negative, it becomes consuming. So this Yom Kippur, the day of atonement, I decided to take it upon myself to take part in it. Yeah, I’m Jewish, but i’ve never been religious. I feel like religion can be a great thing, but when it becomes organized religion, it becomes like a chore, a hassle. It feels like you have to meet up to a lot of standards that I don’t really have the time to be living up to. And most of all, most organized religions teach you about a God that I particularly don’t believe in. So you now may be wondering “how can this dude possibly celebrate such a high holy day if he on his phone on tumblr talkin bout how he don’t believe in God?” Well the beautiful thing about Judaism, and well being able to choose things in general, is that you’re able to build your own ideals, yet still be influenced by the ideals of Judaism and still consider yourself Jewish and can still be accepted in the Jewish community. So on the idea of God, I don’t believe HE exists, but I believe the concept exists. I believe we are all our own Gods, and that we have the ability to transcend ourselves and be able to become pure through your own means, as long as you aren’t hurting anybody or yourself. The challenge of life is to find that little technique. To me, that’s more meaningful than trying to ask forgiveness from a dude that probably would have higher priorities. Finding forgiveness for yourself, and realizing the mistakes you made yourself, and finding out how to get over things yourself (as opposed to asking that guy for an answer) is more meaningful and useful than the other method. So this idea eliminated the thought of waiting til sundown, and the idea of going to services. Why have someone else tell me how i’m supposed to feel or what i’m supposed to do? I fasted, but I only fasted til I was done thinking things through, writing shit out, because I feel like that’s all I needed to do. Why spend a set amount of time on something that could take forever for some people, and a couple of minutes for another? As I said, you are you’re own God, so if you found yourself in a time of darkness through whatever means (as long as you ain’t hurting anyone or yourself) than why starve yourself til sundown? See, the way people do things are outdated. We live in a time of science and technology. If they prove that The God doesn’t exist through science, at least mine will. I’ve literally changed myself for the better, made my conscious clear, and through a bit of introspection, found myself, while respecting the Jewish way in my own way. That to me is Yom Kippur, that to me is Judaism.
Yom Tov, jew wuu if you bang, muhfugga
I paid my fare
See, I know my destination
But I’m just not there” — Kanye West, “Street Lights”
This guy
Get ‘em gang.
I now have tumblr for my droid. Dope.
